Today i have done ok....I haven't eaten to much or anything bad. Although i wanted to so badly get a heap of freshly made still warm donuts today while i was out they smelt so good but i just kept walking!
I am thinking i need to get someone to take some photos of me now.... so once i have lost the weight and toned stuff(well as much as i can) i can see the difference. I know i will hate the photo of now but i think seeing it will make me work that much harder. Plus i would like to see the huge change i will have gone through doing this for myself. I even decided that once the weight is off i am going to rustle up enough money to go and get glamour shots done of myself.. i have never done anything like it but i have always wanted to. Only thing stopping me was my weight so once it is off i will get those photos as a kind of reward for myself for doing such a huge thing.
I know some people don't see it as a huge thing but for me chocolate and baked goods are my addiction,it's my thing so getting past having huge amounts everyday is a massive thing to over come. Also getting this weight off has always been a challenge i have had this weight since i was pregnant with Jack and because i was in a loving relationship i didn't see how big was till months after we broke up cause as you do,you see yourself through their eyes and once that wore off i cried for days at how big i was. Mind you from then till now i am about 15-20kg lighter then i was but still i would like to be even less i want to be healthy and for my son not to tell me how big my belly is and give it a few years and if i am still big Lilly will be saying it. I still have a pair of size 12 jeans i will one day fit back into lol i love these jeans i will never part with them so i may as well lose the weight and wear them to death LOL.
Speaking of jeans i went to K-mart to get myself a new pair of jeans as the ones i have are getting rather lose and i don't have a belt that fits atm (it just doesn't fit) so i thought it is $20 for a new pair stuff it will get some... i got to try them on and all there sizes have changed! I mean WTF???? K-mart always had realistic sizes and i loved it... Cheap clothes that are comfy you cant go wrong but now ti has all changed i was devastated and i refuse to buy a pair of pants that say one size when i know i shouldn't be buying that big size :( i will keep on wearing these jeans and just keep pulling them up till i see a bit more of a loss with my waist and then i will go on a jeans hunt somewhere else!
Well i am gunna go do my scarey mum thing cause jack wont sleep.....
xoxo
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